Interesting

I suppose I found the idea of public speaking very interesting. I thought it was interesting mainly because it is what most people classically associate with communication when I tell them that it’s my major. Often we think about public speaking in a way that doesn’t give it the credit I think it deserves. The skills to motivate, emotionally move, and/or tell a story to a large group of people is beyond belief difficult. I have on many occasions had the opportunity address a large group, and every time I am awed at the courage and skill that professional politician, CEO’s and the like posses. Most people are familiar with the butterflies, but to be able to look out to the crowd and flow with ease in and out of often-difficult subjects is amazing. People have to be able to read a crowd and respond to their changing needs and interest. WOW.

What I liked, disliked, and learned

My favorite thing about this class was the blogging. I enjoyed thinking about concepts through my own lens, and there never seemed to be to many restrictions on the way we had to discuss. Three times a week was great because it forced me to continue to be engaged throughout the week whereas it could have been easy to spend one day on this class and then forget about it until the following week. My least favorite thing was probably responding to other people’s journals. This felt forced, and I didn’t always have much to say. I think it would be great if we could find another way to connect with the other students in our class if that was the point. All and all I learned more about watching, observing, and identifying different types of communication in real life settings. I also learned about how I react to those types of communication.

"intentionality"

Intentionality. When the heck do we communicate without intention? Isn’t that the point of communication? We could easily take this path and this path only, but the truth of the matter is that communication is not always intentional. One could easily argue that most non-verbal communication is not intentional. In fact we could even go as far as to say that intentionally through people off with non-verbal communication are rather clever. The intentionality of communication is interesting in so much as it can help us to better understand the true motives behind the sender. It can also helps us, if genuinely used, help us to read the emotions of the sender. I find often that when I’m upset during a meeting that someone I know will ask me later if I was ok. It seems as though I wear my emotions on my face and in my posture. This is an example of unintentional communication.

The Game of Communication

It seems clear that the pragmatic perspective is well conceived. We can see evidence in almost every interaction we have. People often refer to an argument as either winning or losing. What an interesting idea. I can win an argument. This can lead people to drop all sense of personal dignity and respect for the sake of the competition. I once read that the true idea of an argument is to try to understand the opponent’s perspective more than sell our own. My boss says, “Argue as if you are right, and listen as if you know nothing.” Not everyone approaches communication in this manner though. One could see the work of teachers, therapists, and counselors in a more proactive role. They tend have our best interests at heart. However, we could see a therapist’s role in terms of a big game of truth or dare. How or what do they have to do to get us to open up? Maybe all communication can be viewed as a game.

Social Construction

Social construction is what we are really talking about these days. This morning on my way to work I heard an article on NPR about the court’s decision yesterday to repeal the voter approved ban on same sex marriage. This is not about my personal view or feelings on the subject (which I’m not shy about), but it seems to really be about what we as a society mean when we use the word “marriage.” It seems clear that the opposing sides won’t find a middle ground at any point in the foreseeable future, but how is it that the simple official definition of a word can give some people extreme happiness while at the same time as giving other extreme sadness. This to me is the most recent example of how we as a society can shape the happiness of our own members through shared beliefs. BTW, I agree with the judge.

Problems Honestly Observing

There are a number of dilemmas that can come up in a ethnographer’s research, but the main issues I can think of that would strike on a moral level would revolve around covert roles. In order to keep your role as a researcher a secret one must lie to the very people they are trying to get to trust them. These lies can be difficult the longer a research stays in the covert role mainly because it would be hard if not impossible to not form a personal relationship. The other thing that can come from creating relationships is the difficulty in making objective observations. It has happened to everyone. We like the people, but our job is to study them in a scientific manner. Then you code all the data and form an opinion that is supported by the data. However, if you like the subjects then it is much more likely that your data will be jaded.

Ethnography and Deception

My personal favorite in terms of research is ethnography. I love to watch people and thinking about, guessing, and discussing the possible reasons why people do what they do. I think this is so interesting because it requires an understanding of people, their mannerisms, various cultural differences, and emotion. When thinking about the idea of deception I automatically go to sales people, so I would research something around the various types of deception salesmen employ on heir work. My question would be: Do cultural differences of customers change the method of deception used by sales people? I’m not sure what method I would use to answer this question, but I wonder if ethnography won’t be a perfect match. Interviewing those that sell and those that bought from them would make an interesting research project. It would give a fairly whole picture of the reasons why different deception tactics were used, and is cultural differences really play role.

Informal Channels vs Formal

We learn about the different modes of organizational communication, and their usefulness in chapter 8. One of the things that stood out for me was the variation between formal and informal channels of communication. I was interested mostly because I have been doing some research about formal versus informal communication with organizations as it pertains to identifying competencies. The text says, “Both forms of communication are essential to the life of the organization.” (p. 218) However, what I have found is that while both obviously take place, and they each have different types of information base through them, informal communication tends to be more popular amongst those at lower levels. Also, it is interesting how much legitimacy informal information carries. Often we find these rumors to be truer than not, even though the classic “water cooler” conversations can be deemed gossip. So, I would agree that both informal and formal channels are essential to the operation of any organization.

Importance of Mediums

I very much agree with Marshall LcLuhan’s idea that the “the medium is the message.” We see this sort of thing all the time where I work. People are turned off, or begin to ignore the message if the way it is communicated isn’t well received. In this the medium is crucial to the success of the message. I think that the new generation learns is very much that of the mosaic logic. I heard an article recently about the constant perceived need for students in high school and college to be connected. The article went on to explain the student’s inability to be alone. Without TV, smart phones, Facebook, or the internet they won’t know how to communicate with people. In this way be see their need, potential as a result of growing up on TV, their need for information quicker and quicker. I fond myself stuck partially in that world, but even more afraid of being past up by it.

Cyber Buddies!

I have yet to create a new friend from cyberspace. I have, however, maintained a few friendships with the help of social networking sites such as Facebook. I think this has come easier to me because I already place value on these people, and really that value comes in the form of time. The rest of my life is fairly full, and the idea of trying to find new friendships via the web sounds tiring. I never really understood the point of establishing whom you are in written terms mainly because I always seem to have a harder time expressing myself in written in comparison to in person conversation. I think I just enjoy watching people so much that it seems like half the fun of getting to know someone and hanging out with them would be immediately, and needlessly, eliminated. I think it made sense when this was the only way to gather or share information from a great distance, but we can share so much more these days with modern technology.

Choosing a Leader

As I read chapter seven I found myself drawn to the idea of leader emergency. In the text we hear about Fisher’s idea of leader emergence in terms of participant elimination. Does this really seem right? Haven’t you ever been in a situation where you simply never wanted to even speak let alone be the leader of a group? However, I suppose that at the onset of any discussion all participants could be considered in equal contention for the noteworthy honor of leader. Fisher goes on to tells us that he believes all initial conversation is a bid for the spot, and natural attrition begins to set in. Eventually people drop out in order to take on other roles, and finally one person, potentially with the help of his/her group, take the lead. Then the tough task of leading the group towards accomplishment sets in. Hopefully the group chose the right person.

Romantic Cues

When I look at people in terms of romantic partners I have to say that the things that strike me as attractive have changed. This may seem obvious to some, but for me my desires have changed with time, life stages, and intellectual aptitude. I can completely see how proximity plays a pivotal role in influencing romantic partner possibilities. I don’t want to try to date someone I’ll rarely see. As for preinteraction cues I look for someone who cares about their physical appearance, but doesn’t hold it in such high importance that it consumes them. Once we begin the interaction phase I want someone who will challenge me without trying to dominate every situation. I also look for someone who is well rounded in their ability to hold a conversation, views of the world, and friendships. Cognitive cues are by far the most important. I look for someone that has a passion for life, values family, and understands commitment.

Partners

I cannot imagine that a long-term relationship could survive in any sort of healthy manner if partners only held to a rigid complementarity, competitive symmetry, or submissive symmetry pattern. If I had to guess I would say that the worst of the three styles would be the competitive symmetry mainly because there would always be this desire to dominate the other. A agree that some form of competition can drive people to push beyond preconceived ideas, however, at what point would you slow down enough to appreciate life around you.
I would also guess that the submissive symmetry would be the most damaging to one’s self-esteem mainly because you would no longer have a sense of personal identity. Without some form of personal identity than a person is no longer a person, but a mechanical robot. I believe that we all need to stand up and ask/fight for what we want because it is rare that anyone else will do it for you.

Panel Discussions

The panel discussion can be a very valuable tool for when trying to better understand and share information about a certain topic. The idea is simple in concept, but the execution can vary widely based on the moderator, the panelists, and the audience. The text says, “The key to moderating or participating in a panel is to be well informed, to listen carefully to others, and to make sure the discussion is coherent.” (p. 205) One of the best panel discussions I have had the opportunity to listen to was about sustainable fishing practices. The moderator was an environmental law professor who was well spoken, and well informed about the subject. The panelists varied to include a member of the Monterey Bay Aquarium fish watch, a culinary instructor, a representative of the Alaska fishermen’s group, and a writer who had just finished a book all about sustainable fishing practices around the world. The discussion was so informative that I can easily say everyone walked away more informed than when they had walked in, and they enjoyed it.

Images of Self

I believe that we as human beings want to achieve perfection, and that is one of the things that drives us to explore, change, and improve. I have a hard time with the idea that we are born into sin, and that is our driving force. I just don’t like to think that my 8 month old son is sinful. The rationality premise is something that I think has a lot of merit. This idea, “the belief that most people are capable of discovering the truth through logical analysis,” (p. 353) is a cornerstone in American culture. The text tells us that, “many American institutions, including democracy, trial by jury and free enterprise,” (p. 353) are all born out of the rationality premise. Finally, the mutability premise is a basic concept in communication theory, shared understanding/meaning. This concept tells us that we are molded from a external influences and that the only way to improve our lives is to better those influences.

Shared Culture

I would say that I only half agree with Ruth Benedicts’s statement about how we are creatures shaped by our culture. I would agree that culture is shared, and in that the text says, “we learn very early to separate the world into “us” and “them,” and we work very hard to make sure that others recognize which of the two we are.” (p. 344) This is something I have seen in many instances, and I think it is probably tied to our inherent human desire to be a part of something larger. The text also says, “Because cultures are shared, we are not entirely free to act as we wish.” (p. 344) This is where I disagree, and disagree fairly strongly. I believe that we all have the power to choose to be who ever we want, but the truth of the matter is that there are repercussions from anything we do. It is like Newton’s third law, to every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction

Nonverbal tells

Nonverbal communication isn’t something we can turn off. It is one of those things that people send years trying to study and master as it can give you subtle insight into individuals. Think out a professional poker player, and every time you hear someone talk about trying to understand an opponents tell. In this way they are trying to understand the nonverbal cues that their opponent cannot stop from happening. Unlike our ability to watch what we are saying, at least some of us, nonverbal communication really shows our emotions immediately. Often I find that they happen without thought, so in this way my nonverbal cues can get me in trouble. A year or so ago I was having a one on one with my boss and he mentioned that during a meeting I would shift my posture whenever a particular person would speak. He knows that I had some difficulty working with this person, but suggested that I be careful because my cues were so apparent. Needless to say I had no idea I was doing that.

Gender Based Conversation

I do think that men and women typically use language differently. I can see this in my own relationship with my wife very clearly in situations where I come home and she lays into me about my day and all the details. Many times I simply want to be more private about the failures, but this is something that I have been actively trying to shift. The text says that the majority of men use rapport talk while women use report talk. In this way I can see how the genders have been stereotyped, but UI don’t think it is something that we either can’t or shouldn’t want to shift. I would love it if at times my wife could be a little more straight forward, and conversely I think she would love it if I would be more relational in my conversation. This does not mean that we should all try to communicate in the same way, however, there is some room for shared understandings.

Perceive others

I don't think it is possible to have an interaction with someone or something without automatically judging it in some way. This is the only way we can understand what we see, and the meanings behind them. The text says, “When we focus on a portion of the sensory world, we immediately label and categorize what we have perceived.” (pg 50) We use what is called schemata to define what we see based on a shared social understanding.
I do believe we can judge things more fairly by simply slowing down our though process, and taking the time to reevaluate what we see for that moment without judging to harshly on our past experiences. The text says that we should, “recognize how complex perception is and how easy it is to get things wrong.” (pg 54) In this way we can take the following step by reading up on, or getting updated on ideas prior them taking place. This allows us to focus on what is, rather than what we think it is.

Sharing Understanding

I think that we "build worlds" through communication mainly due to the fact the we use communication to create culturally accepted meanings. At first I though this sounded a lot harder than it is. The cornerstone of building a common understanding in any cultural is shared experiences. We do this through a varity of ways such as the United States's concept of pedestrians always have the right away when crossing the street. In Italy you take your life into your own hands when crossing the street, but in the U.S. it is ingrained through our experiences growing up, drivers training, and state laws.

These shared ideas taken for granted, however, I beleive that our personal happiness is tied to them. It is how we feel safe, and more over it empowers each of us to go out into the big crazy world with some sence of comminality and confidence. Without a sence of shared meaning we would have to recreate the world every time we left the house.

Speech Design

In chapter 10 we read about how a good speech comes together, and what elements to think about as we design it. One concept seems to stick out for me more than the rest, audience adaptation. I think this is a key concept mainly because the entire point of a speech is to reach and influence the audience, so adapting your concept to those listening can make or break our ability for that message to resonate. The text says that we should think about the following three things, “its central idea and structure, its supporting materials, and its style.” (pg 278) We read about a host of situations that would require the speaker to tailor their speech in one way or another, and each situation holds a different challenge. My favorite quote says it all, “It is not a good idea to try to clarify a concept by comparing it to a computer if the people in your audience are computer illiterate.” (pg 279)

Influential Speakers

I can think of a number of speakers over the years that have influenced my in profound ways. I think it’s important, as the text says, to understand whom you’re speaking to, however, when someone like the President of the United States speaks it is impossible to understand/craft a perfectly tailored speech. One person that I thought was a profound speaker was Michael Pollan. He spoke on the Stanford campus a year or so ago about the nature of what we eat, and the long-term effects it has on the planet, our bodies, and our communities. He was so passionate and well spoken that I found myself drawn to his every word.

One of the worst speakers I’ve had the opportunity to hear was a stand up comedian of all people. Here is a person that speaks to audiences for a living, and in the heart of San Francisco he thought it would be a great idea to crack jokes about homosexuals. Not only that, I would swear he was under the influence of something.

Timing, understanding the audience, passion, and a firm understanding about the subject are all things I think assist in a great speech.

Introduction

Hello world,

Even though my wife set up a blog about a year ago so we could document the trials and tribulations of being first time parents, I've only posted one entry. Recently I have been getting more and more interested in the idea of sharing my thoughts with the world mainly because I think the time spend writing down my thoughts would help me slow down enough to reflect. I find that between work, school, family, and friends I tend to spend less and less time thinking about my own life. I used to look for quiet places so I could consider the implications of my interactions with the world. Every now and agin when I have a free second, mostly on my drive home, I feel bits of remorse simply because I know how great life is, but I've allowed myself to get so upset over something trivial.

This class forces me to slow down enough to gather my thoughts. So I can say that one of the things I look forward to most is the reflection time. I've take a fair number of online classes due to scheduling, but the more I take the more I enjoy the ability to learn at my own pace. It's fortunate that I'm a self starter, and procrastination is not something I enjoy.

Thank you world for listening, and I look forward to getting to know everyone.